So... never mind. Sigh.
I was going to try upgrading to r21, and filled my disk doing an ipkg upgrade, which broke my zaurus. So I re-flashed and was going to do the upgrade but figured I would give it one last college try.
Re-flashed, inserted card...
modprobe hci_uart
hciattach /dev/ttyS3 bcsp 230400
et voila! It worked. Grr. I wish that had happened a week ago.
So for anyone else trying to get a Socket Rev H card working under Openzaurus 3.5.3 collie on a Sharp Zaurus Sl-5500, hopefully this will help. There.. I think I put enough keywords in this so people can find it in google
Thanks for the help!