After looking at the source code (looks like they need to make a small change to allow connections for a period of time), the fix is really really simple...
Choose Qtopia 1.7 as your sync software in the Security app. It will still sync with Intellisync and requires ONE click of Allow.
I can't believe no one else has tried this....
WTF! Now it's working... So, papercrane, you're my personal hero now
I also tried security app settings for "Qtopia 1.7" and "Opie 1.0" before, but it wouldn't work for me (EDIT: it appeared that no connection could be established via Intellisync). Maybe I did anything else wrong or I got into trouble caused by another oddity. Please see:
zaurus sometimes disconnects from desktopCurrently I am running Hentges ROM OZ3.3.6-pre1/Opie 1.1.4 on my 5500. I've noticed that having chosen "Opie 1.0" for "sync software" in the security app on my 5500, sync process is any faster than having chosen "Qtopia 1.7".
Interestingly I do not have to confirm "Allow" anymore (EDIT: not even only ONE time). Neither using "Qtopia 1.7" nor using "Opie 1.0" setting in security app.